eellspoems

poetry (and essays) by john eells

Posts Tagged ‘fear’

Broken

Posted by restorel66 on November 10, 2009

cracked_glass man on knees

Between us, on a tabletop of glass,
a working hand becomes a hammer.

A man wants his way.
He won’t take no.

Blood, though not spilled, boils.
Shards ring out and sing

the ways we will not mend—
how the heart, like a fractal,
repeats a pattern of breaks
and splits when magnified.

My heart rages.  It pushes blood
along a crooked line of strife

until I heed the rattle-crack
and attend the bang of anger.

The embittered rackets rise until
the broken pieces lay at rest between us.

Posted in Aesthetics, Education, Entertainment, Life, Poems, Poetry, Relational Strife, Relationships, fear, violence | Tagged: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 2 Comments »

The Pastor-Beggar

Posted by restorel66 on February 26, 2009

The pastor-beggar drifted
‘cause the way is never clear when
the chips and blows and
glances form an idol out of fear.
He

bobbed along in bluster
till he almost blew away.
The ones they call his demons
said he held a hand
to play. So he

laid down his last dollar, kept
an ace down in a hole, till
the queen of hearts came
steady on and seared him
like a coal. Now his heart is

shreds and tatters and
his heart is filled with ruth where
the teeth of self-
deception gnawed
the corners of the truth…still,

the broken plate of comfort
that once served his precious
wish must, in time, become
a banquet on a fine and
costly dish. And

the pastor will be proven
by the testing of the years
as a beggar who gained
riches; as a king who
reigned with tears.

Posted in Aesthetics, Education, Entertainment, Poem, Poems, Poetry, faith | Tagged: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a Comment »

Three Words Get Stuck

Posted by restorel66 on November 20, 2008

Three words get stuck in the parking lot
when I’m standing there with you at
the end of the night. I call up
the courage gods, but cannot hold your gaze.

They arrive to have a laugh, not to
lend a hand. I nod my head and blink while
an antenna points at the stars, frowns
at me from behind your shoulder.

I resend the message—Cannot execute!
Someone! Send a dash of spice, a pinch of
salty courage action!—while earthbound
compliments drop from my lips, unseasoned.

I will unlock my full flavor and let you
relish my delicious passion. You’d like
a little nibble of my heartfelt treat…And
then again, I may just fumble for my keys.

I reach for car door, for words that will
have to do. Awkward silence breaks: unsavory
sounds formed with the mouth. My heart
races, but won’t budge from that parking space.

Posted in Aesthetics, Education, Entertainment, Poem, Poems, Poetry, Relationships | Tagged: , , , , | Leave a Comment »